So i have been working nights a lot lately, and am now super tired... i might just moan a bit now, and please ignore probable spelling and grammar issues
Straight to it... like the title says... i reeeally need a good kick up the arse right now... since my last major piece "Character Concept" i have started around 20 different paintings... and none of them have been finished... i start them, and then get bored and start a new one... if i just stuck with each one, i could have had more finished pieces in my gallery.
Because i set my expectations soooooo high, if they are not perfect, i tend to give up... i think what i need to do, is not try so hard right now, and instead, focus on training my abilities first. I am such an extreme perfectionist, and the thought of not being a perfectionist for a while makes me actually negotiate myself as an artist... but i better make a choice... either no finished artworks... or suck it up and just finish a bloody painting.
I am constantly trying to achieve what i think people want to see from me, instead of just painting for myself and the fun of it. So i do not really have a style of my own, as deep down i feel it will be discredited by everyone. I have for too long, got caught up in replicating other artists styles as i know i cannot really go wrong. Combined with personal issues of my own, i do not really get a clear head to paint... so i think the best thing for me to do is start again... and just go for it! ...Do what i like without worrying wether people will like it or not. As well as worrying wether I will like it or not. That can come at a later date, but right now, i think i should just let loose and be free!
I would like to start enjoying it more, instead of taking it too seriously and being so heavily critical over my ability to paint.
...so there is my rant... and thank you to those who have read through it!
Please feel free to let me know what u think, or if you relate to this at all,
Thanks a lot!
...whats the betting i will read this tomorrow after some sleep and it won't make one bit of sense... probably quite likely, anyway, take care people!